oh internet

The most overrated device in existence.

Summary

The iPhone refers to a line of smartphones running iOS, being developed by Apple and manufactured by enslaved Chinese sweatshop FoxConn employees who work for pennies by the hour. The iPhone is basically taking Apple's iPod devices, but given phone and web browsing capabilities. Some have referred to the iPhone as the "Jesus Phone". The iPhone is one of the most loved and hated devices ever, having both an immense fan base and detractors. Android is the iPhone's greatest nemesis, and both fan bases are often lashing out at each other back and forth. Because of this, topics relating on the iPhone happen to attract fan boy wars rather instantly, especially on notable tech blogs.

Origins

The iPhone: it has everything.

There have been rumors of an alleged iPhone circling around the Internet for years as well as hundreds of fan concepts, even before the idea was but a twinkle in Steve Jobs's eyes. After the horrible failure that was the Newton, Steve Jobs had considered entering the handset market. Given their huge success by the iPod, Apple partnered with Motorola On September 7, 2005 and released the ROKR E1, which was the first phone to have iTunes. Despite having iTunes, the ROKR E1 was horribly buggy and had a puny 512 MB limitation, which meant you could only store about 100 of your mediocre faux-metal band that nobody has heard of or cares about in poor quality. Two other phones from Motorola that included iTunes followed in suit, which were the SLVR L7 and the RAZR V3i. Since the phone wasn't designed to meet all of Jobs' dogmatic demands, Apple decided to stab Motorola in the back and later released the iPod Nano which in turn cannibalized the ROKR. Later that same year, Apple began to develop their own phone.

On January 9, 2007, at the Macworld convention, the iPhone was announced, making Apple fan boys all over the world cream their pants over a device that lacked basic and important features that most phones have had for years. The device was hyped all over the media, and it instantly became the latest trend. And so, on June 29, 2007, the world was introduced to the iPhone, an overpriced, over hyped, and most definitely, overrated phone that literally cost $50 to make that was sold exclusively on AT&T (Cingular WIreless at the time) for $499 for the 4GB model and $599 for the 8GB model on a 2-year contract. Most phones wouldn't cost that much unless they were sold without a subsidiary. Never mind the outrageously unreasonable price tag, the iPhone's monthly bill was a different money draining monster altogether. In fact, the iPhone bills weighed as much as an anchor, and a YouTuber by the name of iJustine released a video about her 300-page iPhone bill, which soon became viral. Despite the phone's price being highway robbery, it didn't stop the tens of thousands of Apple fan boys that would literally buy anything that had an Apple logo slapped onto it lining up at their local AT&T store's for weeks. Additionally, the device was able to sell a million units within 74 days.

Many had credited the iPhone as yet another ''magical, revolutionary, and innovative" product by the genius minds from Apple. Though unbeknownst to the millions of iFans claiming Apple is always original and that everybody is always "stealing" their ideas, the iPhone's design was ripped from LG Prada, which was announced a whole month before the iPhone.

Hardware

Yeah, totally worth the $500 on contract.

In the beginning, there was the original iPhone (which many people refer to it as the iPhone 2G). While it brought many features for a phone that were unheard in the mainstream consumer market (because let's face it, most of the iPhone's so-called "innovation" was present on other phones in Asia), it also lacked many key features other phones have had for years. Such features missing included:

• No MMS
• No third party applications
• No 3G (which meant you would have super slow internet unless you had WiFi)
• No GPS
• No copy and paste
• No expandable memory
• A mere 2-megapixel camera with no flash or video recorder
• Not being able to zoom in when using the camera
• You couldn't use custom ring tones
• No games
• Horrible reception.

It's a lot easier to list things it did have, which would hardly be a list, yet that still didn't stop people from lining up to spend their entire rent money on the phone that was going to be $100 the year after.

iPhone 3G

Given the success of the original, Apple released a successor in Jully 11, 2008. Rather than call it the "iPhone 2", they named it the "iPhone 3G". The iPhone 3G looked exactly the same on the front, but had a redesigned back, using plastic rather than aluminum. Unlike the original iPhone, this one wasn't priced so ridiculously high, and was priced at $199 for the 8GB version and $299 for 16GB. It also introduced features that should have been on the first iPhone such as an application store to download third-party apps, GPS, and of course 3G data. Apple also reduced the price on the original iPhone (the 8GB model, the 4GB was discontinued) to $99. This had outraged thousands of early adopters who paid $600 when they could have waited a year for a better iPhone that didn't cost an arm and a leg to buy.

The iPhone 3G.

Again, like its predecessor, the iPhone 3G still had horrible reception, no copy paste, no MMS, and still had its mediocre 2-megapixel camera with no video camera or zooming capabilities. Many people had blamed the 3G connection issues on AT&T considering the the carrier's connection had been congested because of iPhone users. While AT&T does have crappy reception, some smartphone users that don't have an iPhone haven't reported such issues. It's debatable whether the blame for the iPhone's horrible connection was AT&T's fault, or the iPhone's.

iPhone 3GS

Seeing that people will line up to buy an iPhone if you add hardly anything new and keep the same exact design, Apple released the iPhone 3GS on June 19, 2009. In a nutshell, it was an iPhone 3G, but faster, with an improved camera that could record videos, landscape keyboard, voice controls, ability to cut, copy, and paste, and more memory. Again, all features that should have been on the first iPhone, but then again if that were the case Apple wouldn't have anything new to introduce if they actually did add those from the start.

iPhone 4

This how to hold an iPhone if you want it to work.

As iPhone fans were hopelessly expecting for a dual-core iPhone 4G with a bigger screen, the iPhone 4 was released June 24, 2010. Some of the things that was new in this version of the iPhone was a new and slimmer body, a faster processor, retina display with higher resolution (or in other words, an IPS display manufactured by LG but called "retina display" so Apple could make it seem like they invented some magical, revolutionary screen technology), a front-facing camera that came with Apple's Facetime making camwhoring easier than ever with the addition of video chatting (only through WiFi), and of course the infamous antennagate.

The antennagate was a serious flaw in the iPhone 4, as giving the iPhone a "death grip" (read: holding it in general) would make the phone lose its signal completely. Because of this, Apple issued an apology to upset iPhone fans and gave them free bumper cases to ease their woes and prevent their bars from dropping.

Apple also released the phone in two colors like the last two generations, but this time, rather than just have the back a different color, the whole phone would be colored. While many were eagerly awaiting the white iPhone (those racists!), it was delayed for months. Although it didn't matter much considering you were going to put a thick, ugly case over it anyways.

iPhone 5 4G 4S

The upgrading process.

Again, iPhone fans were hopelessly expecting for an iPhone with 4G and a bigger screen, and rather than come out within a year after its predecessor, this iPhone took 15 months to be released. The iPhone 4S was to the iPhone 4 as the iPhone 3GS was to the iPhone 3G; they were virtually the same phone, but with an "S" added to their name. Internet rumors circulating all over the web that the new iPhone (which was rumored to be called the iPhone 5 or iPhone 4G) was going to be completely redesigned, with a larger screen rather than keep its puny 3.5" screen when the competition were all using 4"+ screens, and most importantly, have 4G LTE. However, as the hearts of the cult-like Apple fans were beating like a jack rabbit on steroids, Tim Cook, taking Steve Job's position as the CEO, announced the iPhone 4S. iFans everywhere were greatly disappointed that there was no iPhone 5, even though they still lined up for the phone anyways. To make matters worse, turtleneck-wearing Steve Jobs croaked from cancer, though some argue the disappointment of the new iPhone was enough to make him die.

The iPhone 4S included a dual-core processor, an improved 8-megapixel camera, and Siri, Apple's gimmicky voice recognition software.

iPhone 5

Because adding a moderately larger dispay with an extra row of icons and a few features from 2011 = Innovation!!!

Following a trend of yawn-inducing press conference for a new iPhone, Apple announced the iPhone 5, aka the Long Phone, which again looks exactly like last year's model, but longer with an extra set icons. For instance, Apple finally succumbed to adding a larger display, going from a 3.5" to a 4" display, even after Steve Jobs went on how the iPhone's signature 3.5" was perfect and it didn't need to get any larger. Following a larger screen, Apple also bumped the display's resolution, only affecting the length pixels giving it a 1136x640 resolution. Other changes include a thinner frame, aluminum back instead of the crappy glass ones that would almost always shatter easily, a new connector called Lightning Connector, LTE, and an A6 processor. Apple even went so far as to claim that their new iPhone is the thinnest smartphone ever (lol no), even though it's neither the thinnest, second nor even third thinnest smartphone in the world.

Like the iPhone 4S, there wasn't as much excitement for the iPhone 5 like there was the iPhone 4. This is obviously due to the iPhone no longer being as interesting anymore, being too little too late. Fandroids happen to insecurely mock the iPhone 5 for this very reason in order to feel better of their shitty outdated Galaxy Nexus and even deeming this iPhone a failure despite the fact millions of sheep willing to line up for anything with an Apple sticker on it.

Siri

Siri, the very helpful voice assistant.

Siri was the only thing new on the iPhone 4S, hoping it would give people a reason to upgrade from their iPhone 4 to an iPhone 4S. Like everything else new they put on their products, Apple advertises it as a revolutionary and practical app that is a voice-activated personal assistant. Siri is a wise-talking broad with an attitude - you can ask her for the nearest pizza shop, how to bury your ex-girlfriend's dead body or how much you hate her, and she'll answer with an automated response either telling you how great her father Steve was or that she doesn't feel like answering. Siri can be compared to Cleverbot, although no where near as clever and brutally honest.

iPod Touch

Following the success of the iPhone, the iPod was at risk of becoming completely irrelevant as one would no longer need to carry both a phone and an iPod now that they can get the best (or worst) of both worlds on one device. Given the very pricey bill that comes with an iPhone, Apple decided to release the iPod Touch (mistakenly referred to as the iTouch by ghetto people), which is basically an iPhone minus the phone capabilities. iPod Touches are usually bought by people who carry around those cheap MetroPCS phones their parents bought for them rather than simply the iPhone.

iPhone Killer

The day the iPhone was announced, many companies felt threatened by it. It was a trend setter, and regardless whether it was useless brick or not, people would still buy it. Many handset manufactures began plotting a device to rival the iPhone, hoping to kill it (which they have all miserably failed at). From this, the term iPhone-killer was coined, and as every phone that posed some sort of threat to the iPhone, it would instantly be labeled as an 'iPhone-killer". While one phone was not enough to dethrone the iPhone of its reign as the top selling smartphone, Android OS took a different route in the way that Windows did, flood the market market with thousands of phones that come out by the day with all of them running the same OS.

Patent Trolling

All because Apple was afraid of a little competition.

For a company like Apple, if your product isn't number 1 and monopolizing the market, rather than go back and improve your device to make it more competitive and appealing to the masses, your only other option is to sue the competition. Because according to the company, Apple invented everything, so when the iPhone isn't selling as well as they expected, they'll take the initiative of filing bogus patent infringement lawsuits just so they can have everything their way.

As their attempts at bullying competing companies like HTC or Samsung in hopes of having their products banned from being sold, these companies have decided to fight back, causing lawsuits back and forth. In hopes of putting these patent suits to a much needed end, Google decided to buy Motorola Mobility and its large library of patents for $12 billion, giving Android handset vendors more security from Apple suing them.

What's even funnier is Apple is actually suing a Polish grocery company for using the name A.pl".

Apple has been filing lawsuits for even the most ridiculous things and it'd be no surprise if they were to sue over things such as being able to sell a phone that's round or has a virtual keyboard. Apple has even tried to file a patent for face unlock, a feature that was implemented on Android 4.0 first.

Apple did successfully manage to sue Samsung for over a $1 billion (yes, billion with a "B"), many of the reasons being utterly ridiculous (such as Apple's patent for a rectangle with rounded corners). Their successful litigation is evidence to how screwed up and stupid the American patent system truly is.

Apps

Fart apps make about 60% of all iPhone apps, followed by soundboards and Angry Birds clones.

After the release of the iPhone 3G, Apple introduced the "App Store", which was similar to a phone carrier's WAP store where one can purchase games and tools for their phone. Developers began to flock the App Store with their overpriced applications to perform some of the dumbest tasks. In fact, one app that was removed cost $999.99 and all it did was show people how rich you were. Pretty soon, the App Store began to get flooded by an array of useless apps, especially fart apps, which where soundboards for various farting sounds. Indeed, fart apps were one of the most popular paid applications for the iPhone. Due to the flood of apps, Apple came up with the slogan "There's an app for that", although this only half true given that there's no porn apps on the iPhone.

Jailbreaking

Jailbreaking refers to hacking and removing the strict restrictions on iOS devices. The iPhone is locked like a prison and doesn't allow users to customize it to their liking, hence the name "jailbreaking". Jailbreaking is the only reason to keep an iPhone, and it comes to no surprise that so many iPhone owners have jailbroken their devices. With jailbreaking, you can add features to your iPhone that Apple will probably add in future releases or never add at all, pirate apps (because no one's going to pay $100 for a GPS navigation app when you can get a better app on Android for free), add themes, and you can even install different OS on it (much to the rage of Apple). Because Apple doesn't like people using their products the way they like and impose a tyrannical system so that everyone uses the iPhone they way they imposed, Apple continually battles jailbreaking by releasing updates that get rid of them, making hacking your iPhone a tedious hassle.

Current status

The iPhone 5 is currently the latest iPhone, running iOS 6.X.

Facts

Images

The iPhone after a one foot fall from the ground			Progress
Siri at work		Because Apple never stole anything from Android...
Even Steve Woz prefers Android		The iPhone 10	INNOVASHION
		Text messaging on iPhones produces quality conversations

Videos

Related Pages

Android

Apple

Autocorrect

Blackberry

iPad

iTunes

Mac

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