Epic Beard Man
Nice shoes, bad attitude.
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Epic Beard Man (Thomas Alexander Bruso aka Vietnam Tom aka Tom Slick) is a 67 year old Vietnam war veteran who gained internet fame via YouTube video. In the video, what started as a friendly exchange between him and a stranger on the bus (never a good idea, btw) turned sour and eventually escalated into a violent physical confrontation. The video ends with the older man leaving the bus early, revealing that the t-shirt he's wearing clearly states "I AM A MOTHER F***ER". Truth in labeling, folks.
The event occurred on Bus Number 3057 of the AC transit system at the corner of 20th Street and Webster Street in Oakland, and was first posted to YouTube by Iyanna Washington, another rider on the bus who caught the fight on her phone.
Transcript from the video -
Michael: AC Transit! EBM: How much you charge- Michael: AC Transit! EBM: Let’s get back to business! How much you charging me for a spit-shine? Michael: Wha? EBM: How much will you charge me to shine my Stacey Adams? I’m going to a funeral on Friday. I gotta - Michael: Why? What’s your problem? EBM: You said - Michael: You hear what I said just now? EBM: Yes. Michael: Why a brotha gotta spit-shine your shoes? EBM : Hey man, you offered! Michael : I didn’t offer you s***! EBM: What did you just say when you walked by me? Michael : I said why-why a f***in’ brotha gotta spit-shine your shoes? EBM: Nah, you don't have to. Michael: Why a white man can’t shine his shoes? EBM: It could be a chinaman! It don’t matter! Michael: Look dude. Look. EBM: I ain’t prejudiced.. What, do you think I'm prejudiced? Michael: You take your ass back up there and get the f*** out my face right now. EBM: Why you being so hostile man? Michael: ‘cause, I’m pissed off. EBM : Well, better to be pissed off than pissed on. Michael: Take your ass back up there right now. EBM: ‘cause you ain’t scared, you ain’t scaring this white boy. I'm 67 years old. Michael: I'm 50! EBM: You ain’t scaring me! You ain’t scaring me! You ain’t scaring me! Michael: Now I’ll put my foot up your ass! EBM: OH, NO YOU WON’T! NO YOU WON’T! Woman 1: Hey, hay, HAY! Now chill. EBM: You can put mine up yours. I’m gonna whoop your ass. Sit your little black ass down. Woman 1: Forget about tha’! EBM: You’re gonna sit your mother-f***ing ass down! Michael: I’ll put my foot up yo ass. EBM: No, you wont do nothing to me! Michael: Say it again! Say it, say it, say it all about me now! Iyanna: Say it again. Say it again! Say it again, Pinkey! Woman 1: He’s getting down, nothing you can do about it now. Iyanna: Beat his white ass! F*** this bitch! Woman 2: Nooo... EBM: No you won’t! Woman 1: Leave that man alone, he done nothin’ wrong, brotha... EBM: No, I ain’t getting off. Iyanna: It ain’t worth it, bla, it ain’t worth it. Woman 2: My gawd, shut up... EBM: Prick, you f***ing prick! I will not let you walk on me. Woman 1: He’s an old man. Michael: I’ll put my foot up your ass. EBM: I see tough guys like you and I slap the s*** out of you! Michael: What? Iyanna: Stop it! Michael: WHAAAT? WHAAAAT? EBM: Now, you come here and I’ll... Woman 1: STOP IT! UH UH! *Epic Fight Scene* Iyanna: Ooh... Woman 2: Ooo... ooo.. Iyanna: OH WHAT THE FUUUU-- Woman 1: UH UH! STOP IT... OOOOOH.. KNOCK IT OUUUF! OOOOH LAAAAWD HAVE MERCY! EBM: I TOLD YOU NOT TO F*** WITH ME! Woman 1: Oh! Jesus Christ! Oh mah gaaawd! Michael: Ooooh... EBM: HE HIT ME! HE F***ING HIT ME! Crowd: Oh god... John: He was within a range of me... EBM: HE F***ING HIT ME FIRST! HE HIT ME IN THE FACE! THAT’S SELF DEFENSE! DONT F*** WITH ME BOY. DON'T F*** WITH ME. Michael: Auh man, Next time. Imo f*** you up. Woman 1: Oo. Oof. That did not just happen. Go through dat s***! Heharhehar! Jennifer: You okay back there? Woman 1: Naaoh we need AMBER LAMPS!! Woman 2: That man was on some kind of dope. That’s why he had... Iyanna: Ay we can press charges, bla, I got it on vidayoo teyp. Ooo, yoos leakin. He's leakin. Michael: Damn. That mothaf***a hit me. Woman 1: Are you alright? Michael: Wait, no, no, no. Woman 1: Are you alright? Did he break ya teeth? Michael: NO, BRING M&MS! Woman 1: Aw, he needs M&Ms. Michael: BRING AMBER LAMPS! Woman 2: Shut the f*** up. Michael: I will come back, I will kill dat n***a. Im'o kill dat n***a.
On May 8th 2011 a video was released of Epic beard man with an update on his status and the fact that he is now homeless.
The video was produced with high quality and is intended to garner some donations or help for EBM in Oakland, CA.
- Real name Thomas Alexander Bruso.
- The video ranked among the top five most viewed videos on YouTube in its first week, but was not included in the official list.